The Month of May

May was an incredibly busy month here in Colorado, with lots of activities and teachings to balance. In SOMD, we learned about a variety of topics from teachers with very different lives, ministries to oversee, and ways to look at what leadership looks like for Christians who are called by God.

We had a week on Stewardship by a businessman from Australia with a knack for making plans to see dreams become realities; a week on Spiritual Leadership by a local minister with vision for the community in Golden, CO; and a week's worth of teachings on Bible Study (ie-how to do it well and its importance) by a member of YWAM Denver's staff.

Rather than bore readers with a ton of info, I will try to pick 2 big points that were highlighted last month.

1. The first big teaching point I want to mention is about stewardship. One of my classmates defined stewardship in the following terms -

being diligent with what you have been given, irrelevant of the amount.

Basically, he was referring to taking care of what possessions, gifts, talents, and relationships you currently have. This is what it means to steward well - to appreciate what you have and to use resources wisely.

I think we can all agree that there are many things we could sit around wishing to have. No matter how much money we have, there could always be more. No matter how many relationships we have, we could always wish for something bigger, better, or different.

But consistently looking for something else or something more results in an attitude of malcontent. If we always look at what we lack, we never truly appreciate what we have. Learning to manage what we have well, be it little or much, will carry into every future season of our lives.

Why wish for more before we can truly say we are managing what we have to the best of our abilities?

2. The second point is this: To lead effectively and to make a lasting impact, we need to have biblically-informed and Bible-centered leadership. This of course means that we need to be studying scripture on our own more than ever.

As a man or woman reads the Word more and more, s/he will not only be immersed in godly principles and values, s/he will also apply such principles in daily life. The fact remains that people follow the lifestyle of a person more than the words reproduced on paper, online, or in speech.

Leadership as a way of life makes more of an impact than anything else you could do or say.

Thus, it becomes apparent that allowing the Word of God to transform you individually is the first and best thing to do in this lifetime. Joshua 1:8 puts it this way:

"This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success."

Choosing to immerse ourselves in God's Book of Law helps transform our values so they match His values. This is how we will most change the spheres we are given the opportunity to impact.

As for getting off-base and applying various principles, last month I was given opportunities to work with homeless ministry through both street evangelism and volunteering with the Denver Rescue Mission. It may feel like giving one meal to those in need does not do much, but at least we were able to help in some small way for that one encounter. 

We also looked for opportunities to pray with those that needed/wanted it and looked for ways to represent the Light to the best of our abilities. Some pictures are below.

As for socializing, we went mini-golfing as a school and had a costume contest at the same time. My small group went as scarecrows and had lots of fun just hanging out for the evening.

Thank you for reading and, as always, God bless!

Struglyfe

I have been struggling to write this update all weekend. Troy Sherman came to our school to speak on the Cost of Discipleship, and there was so much good and convicting info, I don't know where to start!

We spent the majority of the week dissecting 1 Corinthians 4. While the whole passage speaks to the best way to posture one's heart as a Christian, we only dissected the first five verses in five days time. I can't believe the depth the speaker was able to get to with each and every phrase in this chapter.

Once again, we focused on the importance of serving others more than what we traditionally focus on in "leadership." The world makes leadership look a lot like being a captain on a ship or the CEO of a corporation, but Jesus reminds us that the greatest among us in the Church is the greatest servant in our midst.

The fact is that while anybody can learn to be in charge of an organization or start a big project, God continually seeks out those who actively seek Him. His Word says that He looks for those that worship Him in spirit and in truth, and so it becomes apparent that the condition of our hearts trumps accomplishment or position any day of the week.

For if we accomplish big things in His Name, but don't truly know Him, what is the point? To what end are our achievements without pure motives?

Thus, our "success" in Christianity is measured by how well we obey God, not in how many people attend a church we've founded or how many people come forward at an alter call or how many missions-based outreaches we pioneer.

And so our "heart condition" is everything in this life. Not only because that is what truly demonstrates our devotion to God, but also because those who are called to leadership also impact the lives and hearts of others.

Because many of us, myself included, understand this level of responsibility that comes hand-in-hand with leadership, we do our best to avoid being put in charge. Not only will our mistakes as leaders become public knowledge, they may cause others to fall as well.

But this past week we were encouraged to change our perspective from how many times we fall to how many times we get back up. As humans, we are bound to fail and mess up. But God's grace is what empowers us to keep going.

However, there are in fact times when we struggle not because we made a mistake, but simply because life is hard. We like to refer to these times as "Desert Seasons" or "Valleys" in our walks with God.

These seasons are basically times when it is difficult to see God, and it is difficult to know where the road leads. These times are when it is difficult to hold into good character and when it is a struggle to believe God is still there.

Times like losing a home, a loved one, or a job. A time where you see a dream die out, or you deal with disappointment of some kind.

But what if you are only as "Christian" as you are in you "Valley" experiences? 

It is easy to hold onto faith at a summer camp or a Christian conference or in a YWAM program. But how do you behave when you lose sight of everything The Lord once revealed to you when you were at a "spiritual high?"

The true test of faith comes when all looks dark. Faith is proven in times of trouble, heartache, and pain more than when everything is "fun and fancy free."

I write this not to be depressing, or to make you feel like you're not even a Christian, but to encourage you to be aware of the state of your heart in the most challenging of circumstance. The ultimate test is not so much getting over the hard things as much as it is about the state of your heart when working through trials.

Do you seek God just as much in the hard times as the good? Or is it more? Less?

If you are finding yourself IN such a trying time, don't give up! Keep pushing through and seeking the Light. 

For me, it sometimes seems like the majority of my experiences are in valleys. That the "victorious mountaintops" are few and far between.

Perhaps I need to shift my perspective on life as a whole, but perhaps life really is just difficult. 

It is tempting to think during the rough times that God is not with me. That He left me on my own to just muddle through.

But then I remember that light shines brighter in the darkness. And that Christ came into the world to help us walk through our fallenness. 

He doesn't just want to rescue us out of darkness; He wants to get us through it.

And so I hope and pray for faithfulness and hope to abound in good times and in bad. In sickness and in health. As long both as Jesus and I live.

And I pray the same over you.

A minister's actual job..

Last week was our fifth week in the School of Ministry Development. It's crazy to think this much time has passed already and yet there is still so much more to learn before graduation in June!

The teaching topic was Ministry Methods and Biblical Counseling. This of course is quite different from psychological counseling, and so we were given the opportunity to identify various issues that might come up in ministry and how to allow the Holy Spirit to address them.

We talked about things like sin issues, ungodly beliefs that impact our perceptions of God, past hurts and wounds, and demonic influence. We were also given a few "tools" to lean on when coming across any of these issues.

But better than any "tool" is the power of the Holy Spirit to minister to anyone in any given situation. There are things we can do as people to identify issues in our own hearts and lives, but really it is impossible to truly be delivered from sin, hurt, brokenness, or disbelief apart from Jesus.

For example, when I was in my Discipleship Training School back in 2012 (oh, so very long ago), I identified an area of unforgiveness in my life that I had forgotten was there. But until I actually prayed aloud for Jesus to forgive me of my bitterness and cried out for healing, the root stayed there in my heart, affecting my whole life. 

It's just the same for all of us. Trying to overcome sin and be healed by our own strength never fully works. But inviting Christ into these pains and struggles brings freedom from this bondage.

Shifting focus: SOMD students are privileged with planning and leading various activities and times around the base. Last Friday, I got to lead our small group time.

We went up to the Red Rocks Amphitheater to get some reflection time outside of our normal space. As we drove through the mountains, we were all amazed at how much we forget the beauty we live in here in Colorado. Here's a couple photos from our drive:

As we were reflecting, I wrote a short poem about how we often treat ourselves. I haven't fully decided if I'm going to change it, but I wanted to share it, as I often process best through writing songs and articles, etc. 

Anyway, it might be a bold image, but if this resonates with anyone, please let me know. I'd love to pray with and for you.

No one else can make me love me

My matter matters

  soul, spirit, and body

If you be a rebel, lay down your arms

Dreams be extensions and 

  hope does no harm

Fighting yourself is a fruitless affair

True judgement stems from one's own

  harsh stare

You are the rebel,

  The prosecutor,

  The soldier

Which one will shoot first?

Here's the trigger -

  you're the holder

Often I beat myself up far more than I should. We have a standard to live be, yes, but at the end of the day, Christ's blood is all-sufficient.

So if you find yourself in this same boat, please remember to hold onto hope. For while we wrestle all day long with ourselves, Jesus already overcame the world. Don't forget that He can overcome your pain, sorrow, sin, and brokenness, too!

Sorry if this is a bit heavy. To finish off, here's a picture of an adorable small group at an amazing amphitheater. :)

Next time, I'll write on the cost of discipleship. Until then, don't lose hope in God.

Capitalizing on Strengths

Last week in SOMDville, we took two assessments to determine our strengths as leaders. These tests help us to better understand how we interact with people, so we can serve them more effectively.

The first assessment was a general personality profile, called the DISC test, used more commonly in the workplace. It basically helps you figure out if your leadership style is more task-orientated, or people-oriented.

Surprisingly, my categories were almost equal:

The photo might be a little blurry, but this chart basically demonstrates that I lean toward task-oriented thinking, but am also capable of relating fairly well.

The second assessment we did was Strengths Finder, a more in-depth look at what your top five areas of strength are. 

For those of you that are familiar with the test, these were my highest areas of strength:

1. Intellection

2. Empathy

3. Achieving

4. Adaptability

5. Input

Once again, it looks like I have strengths in both strategizing and relationship- building. It's nice to have some more insight into what I have to offer to any team environment in which I may find myself.

While it's useful to have more insight into my own personality and the talents God has given me, the most important thing I took away from last week's teaching is that we should develop our areas of strength so we can capitalize on them.

Think about it - if you already have a talent in one particular area, practicing that talent or strength will result in more growth than an area that you consider one of your weaknesses. So in order to be better leaders, we were challenged to focus on areas in which we already exhibit strength.

Of course it isn't possible to only work on your strengths, especially in the workplace, but there is definitely a lot to gain from building where you have a foundation already. It definitely builds personal confidence, to say the least.

***********

On the weekend, we went out in the surrounding community to do acts of service and ministry. 

My group partnered with a community house for women downtown. They were a part of an organization called Open Door Ministries. We spent the morning painting and priming their house. 

We will be doing more of these inner city missions projects, called Service Saturday, next month. Check out a few photos below!

That's all for now..thanks for reading!

Refined by fire

Week 3 at School of Ministry Development just wrapped up, and dang, was this a heavy week! Our speaker, Doug Toller, addressed the "pitfalls" one encounters in both life and ministry.

We spent extensive time learning about Biblical characters who suffered various trials and also learned a great deal from our speaker's personal experiences as a pastor. While there are many joys to be found in ministry, there can be many hardships, too.

But we also learned about how God uses various trials and sufferings to teach us perseverance and to develop our character. Being under a state of pressure or stress is rarely fun, but it is in fact true that these times shape us more than comfortable situations.

The teaching reminded me of when I studied voice in college. One week, I told my vocal instructor that I felt crazy stressed and anxious and she told me, "Good."

She not only told me that being stressed is good and challenges one to grow, she also compared such a process to a caterpillar. In order to become a full-fledged butterfly, the caterpillar must first confront the darkness of transforming in its cocoon.

At our small group meeting on Friday, we painted with watercolors to process what The Lord revealed to us this past week, and I reflected on how I have grown as a result of the challenges He's enabled me to overcome. Here's what I came up with:

While I know I still face some staggering challenges, I know my God will never leave me, nor forsake me. And so, as I continue to stay true and to seek Him in all things, including my sufferings, I know He will continue to refine my character and set me free from the ashes left behind.

The freedom in defining relational boundaries

Our second week here in the School of Ministry Development felt more grounded than the first. We had our first week of teachings and a more regular schedule than Week 1. It's nice to feel more "settled" here at the base again.

As a student in the leadership school, I am allotted more opportunities to lead other students, alongside listening to daily teachings. These opportunities include leading small groups and book discussions, leading an intercessory prayer group, and teaching newer students how to clean toilets. (Woo!)

This past week, I was thrown back into Housekeeping duties. Personally, I love cleaning the base, as this was my work duty during my Discipleship Training School. However, this quarter I will only be cleaning 3 days a week, as I have also been selected to babysit for one of the families on staff one night every week. I'm excited to have the variety and chance to have fun playing video games with kids!

As for the lecture times, we spent last week discussing Comparitive Religions/Worldview. We spent time learning about and dissecting other ways to view the world around us. While it's impossible to truly be objective when learning these world views, it does help broaden our perspectives so we can better empathize with others.

While I will not spend a ton of time posting info about world religions, as I am sure you can look that up for yourself, I will share two of the main "Take Home" points I picked up. Both of these points stem from studying Judaism/Christianity.

First, both of these religions assume the foundation that God's love for mankind is unconditional. We never had to work to make God choose us.

Because we are given this unconditional love, we also have infinite value in His sight. This is a huge comfort to those that struggle to receive this love.

But the point that really struck me is this - that while God's love for us is unconditional, relationship with Him is conditional.

In order for us to have relationship, with God or with others, there has to be some semblance of parameters in order to define these relationships. Hence, for God to have relationship with us, He defined the simple requirement of going through His son, Jesus.

And so, by extension, we are restored to right relationship with God by entering into reciprocity. For while we are not required to do anything to be loved by God, we are required to do our part within the context of relationship.

I find this profound because it demonstrates the importance of participation in the Christian life. For while I can stand on the fact that God has always loved me and always will, I choose to love Him back, as evidenced by lifestyle habits.

The second insight presented revolves around the laws outlined in the Old Testament. Our speaker this week stated that these laws were put in place by God to protect relationship.

Because man and woman are made in God's image and hold inherent value, laws, rules, and regulations exist as a system to protect that value.

Think about it - the Ten Commandments include a regulation to not steal because stealing from someone breaks relationship with that person. It indicates a lack of respect for the boundary between what belongs to one person and what does NOT belong to him or her.

While stealing is not something I struggle with much, there are in fact other laws and regulations of which I am not a fan. Sometimes these rules are even blatantly ignored. Traffic laws, for example.

But choosing to adhere to a rule or law system does not necessarily have to mean subservience to a totalitarian dictatorship or method of control. Rather, it is a reflection of valuing the sanctity of others, within a defined system.

These are just a few of the concepts we are learning. I hope you also will strive to continue learning about the world around you and about the God who loves and forms you!

SOMD (Phase II) Week 1

Well, it seems I am back at Youth With A Mission!

(And by "seems," of course this means I am back at the Denver base.)

It feels strange moving back here. While the basic setup is the same, many variables have changed. Hence, life is an odd mix of the familiar and the unfamiliar.

The first week in a YWAM program typically involves lots of ice breakers, meet n' greets, and "mixers," as my sister would call them, to encourage new relationships to form.

As an introvert, I've, naturally, spent a lot of time reading in my room. ;)

But I am trusting it will get easier, and I am confident that I will make new friends in time. 

So far, my favorite "group bonding" activity was a Scavenger Hunt with my classmates. My team won, and we all received $5 gift cards to Starbucks! (Score!)

(That's us, winning.)

This particular training program that I'm enrolled in reminds me the most of college, out of all the YWAM schools I've done. The course itself involves a lot of reading, some quizzes, and public speaking.

I'm excited for an opportunity to hone my skills and to apply them to ministry opportunities both now and in the future.

As for week one, we spent a lot of time reviewing teachings on worship, intercession, and fundraising, as these are all integral aspects of YWAM life. 

One thing I took away from our initial teaching on worship is that God reveals Himself through how He's made us. Because we were formed in His image, we reflect aspects of His character.

Similarly, we were made relational because God Himself is a relational being.

And so, we reflect the character of God when we are simply ourselves, as He created us to be.

Living and relating well can even be considered a form of worship.

I know these concepts may seem elementary to some, but it is good to be reminded of simple truths in order to re-find our footing from time to time.

And so, in the Name of Jesus, and for the sake of His glory, this season at YWAM Denver, I'ma do me.

And I hope, you learn to do you, as He's designed you, too.

"For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well."

-Psalms 139:13-14

(Another Scavenger Hunt photo. We are..um..seeking more knowledge and to bear fruit? Haha this is NOT an open door for an Apple vs. PC debate!)